Sodaro's Stories

September 25, 2010

The future indeed looks bright

Filed under: Writer's thoughts — michelle sodaro @ 3:09 pm

The past few days I have been bombarded with images from the past. It has been an amazing journey that has brought me to this also some of those point in my life. I am so blessed to have so many positive, supportive people in my life. There are, of course, also those people that were not truly supportive, were and are jealous, those that have attempted to control me or shape me into what they thought I should be. But I am just me…writer/teacher/student. I am not the one to be controlled or tamed or shaped. I am my own “Captain my Captain.”
I am in the profession where I can excel, I am making progress on my Doctorate, I have tangible goals for getting my novels finished and published so that the whole world can meet the characters that I already know and love. I talk about my characters as if I could invite them over for lunch…they are that real to me and soon they will be that real to everyone.
The past was full of darkness and confusion. I lost my footing many times. But now, the future looks bright and shiny!

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September 20, 2010

The flood gates have opened…

Filed under: Writer's thoughts — michelle sodaro @ 11:09 pm

As I hoped would happen, as I got little glimpses of when I was close to being done with my previous job, the flood gates to my writing have started to open. I worried…I thought perhaps this time I had gone too long without reprieve, had put my muse off too often, had piled too much on the back burner and left too many of my ideas unattended for far too long…I feared that my muse had taken her toys and gone to play in another sandbox and I would merely be left with nothing to play with except the memory of stories that were meant to be written…distant memories of stories I wanted to tell, characters I wanted to meet, all gone because I spent too much time away from the pen this time and my ever-so-patient muse said “forget it.” I imagine she has said this and worse many times over in my starts and stops of authorhood…and who could blame her?
Who could blame my readers as well who have patiently (or not so patiently) waited for stories I started years ago, characters I have left in limbo for more than a decade (it shames me to write that truth)…who could blame my readers and my characters for not packing up their things and finding greener pastures in which to play…but something kept them all there.
Something kept my muse and my readers and my characters on the sidelines of my game, waiting for the coach to call that play and get them off the bench and back into the action. I apologize for the mixing of metaphors; as I mentioned, the flood gates have started to open and just as the mighty river that has been held back too long, all of the stories want to break free first. It is amazing to watch…and more than a little scary. But I am ready to roll with them all. If I could write more than one or type one as I wrote another, I would…this would be an amazing multi-tasking, but even I as a Gemini can only hold one pen at a time; can only type or write at one time. So I dive into this story for an hour and then this story for another hour.
In my dreams all of my stories are intermingling and playing in the sandbox together, which is a heck of a trip to watch…but it is nice to know they are they are still around. It is nice to know they waited for me. So, my readers, my characters, and my muse thank you for waiting around…I’m on board and ready to do it right this time.

September 10, 2010

The strangest places

Filed under: Writer's thoughts — michelle sodaro @ 4:31 pm

“It does not look particularly ‘homeostatic’ when a business man follows his restless activities in spite of the ulcers he is developing” (von Bertalanffy, 1969, p. 193).
So who would have thought that I would get personal inspiration from a nugget in one of my resources for my doctorate, but then it has always been the strangest places where I have found the greatest pieces of wisdom. I have been reflective as of late, of my choice to step away from the security and benefits (and stress and workload) of my last job and concentrate on my passions — teaching, writing, and doctoring (poetic license called into play for the sake of parallelism). There are many who have called me brave for walking away from the known into the unknown, and some of them truly mean brave. Some of them, no doubt, look upon my choice as insanity…and in the truest definition of the word, they would be correct. For haven’t we learned that that word truly means to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results? So, yes, I could have stayed…and promised myself that this time, I would have more balance. That this time, I would be able to have both work and play…responsibility and down time and that my downtime would be productive and my doctorate and novels would get done. But I dislike lying to myself, which is not to say I don’t do it, but it leaves a foul taste in my mouth.
So here is to the shaking up of the status quo…here is to the great unknown…here is to embracing me as a writer…as a teacher…as a doctorate student. Here is to me…embracing all that is at the deepest core of me.
Mr. von Bertalanffy started this thought off, and he is also going to finish it…the alpha and omega of today’s post, if you will.
“Man is not a passive receiver of stimuli coming from an external world, but in a very concrete sense creates his universe” (p. 194). Here’s to my universe!!!
von Bertalanffy, L. (1969). General Systems Theory. NY: George Braziller, Inc.

September 5, 2010

And so it begins…

Filed under: Writer's thoughts — michelle sodaro @ 7:09 pm

So I have officially stepped down from my job and am getting to focus on teaching, writing, and my doctorate. There is a sense of freedom like none I have ever known and I am at peace with my universe. It is amazing how the simple act of turning in a set of keys can allow you to feel like you can breathe again, make you feel alive for the first time in years. I don’t know that I have ever felt this good; I know I haven’t for a while and that makes me alternately sad and mad that I allowed this much of my life to pass me by before I put my feet down and said, “wait. I want to get off this roller coaster.” But my feet are down and while my head may be in the clouds, my feet are firmly on the ground….taking one more and one more step toward my dreams.
Last night and the night before, I was blissfully awakened by the whisperings of my muse. It was beautiful and something I had sorely missed. I had been awakened by many things in recent years, but nothing as wonderful as the whisperings about this story or this idea…I don’t mind the lack of sleep, that is what afternoons are for. But the middle of the night, I have to write this down now before I lose it; the feeling of being alive with creative energy; the need to write as strong as the need to breathe or eat…this I have missed. So whisper on, muse, for you have been patient long enough. It’s high time we took this thing out for the ride of our lives.

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